I’m a huge fan of giveaways.  I enter several a week, in vain hopes that I’ll furnish my house/dress my baby/eat gourmet food, for free.  Trust me, if you enter enough of these things, you’ll win something eventually!  But I’ve had an unusual run of good luck lately: in the last couple of months I’ve won a cookbook, a diaper pail, and a pair of baby legwarmers.  But the biggest win of all was actually my husband’s.  He won a $300 designer purse.

And promptly gave it to me, duh.

I went through all kinds of agonies trying to decide what to do with it.  On the one hand, it’s a really beautiful bag, a classic color and style that also manages to be unique; it’s professional yet feminine, and a nice size.  In short, it’s kind of perfect.  But on the other hand, it’s worth $300!

I’m not a $300-purse kind of girl.  I tend to get my bags from the clearance rack at Target (or, these days, from the diaper bag section of Babies R Us).  I usually go for sporty styles with lots of room for coupons and water bottles and fruit snacks.  I also spend a lot of time poking around on Craig’s List and in consignment stores; I know that people buy and sell nice things that they don’t want or need.  Theoretically, I could sell this purse on Ebay and earn back enough money to buy a purse that’s more my type, and have some left over to play with.

My husband didn’t care either way; he wasn’t invested in giving me a purse as a gift, he’d happened to enter and win a random raffle.  So I started polling friends and family, trying to decide what to do.  If I kept it, would I get up the nerve to use something so expensive?  If I posted it on Ebay, would anyone actually buy?

Pathetically, I felt unworthy of such luxury.  I don’t dress or act like this kind of thing is important to me; the price tag and even the quality seemed wasted on a tomboy such as myself.  Wouldn’t I look odd if I sauntered into Shop Rite wearing a denim skirt and a t-shirt, and carrying this gorgeous posh bag?  I couldn’t help obsessing this is so not me.  I spend $300 on several weeks’ worth of groceries, not on an accessory.

But poking around online always nets me an answer in the end.  I realized than in the greater scheme of posh purses, $300 is a drop in the bucket.  People kept telling me how great the bag was, how fun it is to own something really special.  I also realized that selling it wouldn’t likely be as easy or as profitable as I’d like.  And caught up in the midst of several job applications, I made my decision.

Yes, this purse is way too nice to be used as a snack receptacle.  But it’s also too nice for me to give away my chance to own something special for once.  I’ve been putting off buying a new cheap purse; not using a fabulous one that fell into my lap for free just makes no sense.  I’m keeping it, and saving it for the job interviews that I hope will come along soon.  Maybe carrying a $300 bag will make me feel like I’m worth that kind of value – and will make me act like I’m worth it for potential employers.

But most importantly, while I expect that my next new handbag will cost $30 instead of $300, I’ve come to understand that whether or not you can (or will) spend piles of money on luxury items, not a single inanimate object out there is “too good for me.”